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Thanzi, Thandizo ndi Kusintha - Zotsatira zoyembekezeka ndi zosayembekezeka

Anthu achikulire achi China anali atatha kale kumaliza kuti iye anali kusintha chokhachokha m'chilengedwe. Mosasamala kanthu kuti timagwirizana nawo tokha, chikhalidwe kapena malo apansi. Ndikufuna kapena ayikusintha ndizosapeweka nthawi zambiri ankatsindika.

Sintha kungakhale mwachangu kapena pang'onopang'ono, akalola ndiponso osafuna, kunja kapena mkati, kuyembekezera kapena zosayembekezeka, ndizofunika kapena yake ... Kulikonse kumene ndi wotani ndi kusintha Maganizo athu ndi akuti "tikufunsa" chinachake, chomwe chimatchulidwa ngati chimodzi mwa iwo zifukwa zomanga malo. Iwo amene amaganiza kuti palibe ufulu adzawerenga malembawa kapena iwo kusintha kuthana. Iwo (ine ndikulingalira) onse omwe angakhoze kuvomereza popanda zivomezi zamkati ndi zochitika zirizonse.

Asanayambe kusintha, tiyenera kupeza kuti pali "zambiri". Mmodzi ndinali chomwe tapeza ngati vuto. Izi ndi zomwe ndimasuta, mankhwala osokoneza bongo, amadya mowa, amadya zosayenera, ali ndi vuto ndi anthu okondedwa, pamodzi, kuulula, kuusa moyo kwa chikumbumtima kapena zofanana.

Zina Ndimangoyang'ana mwa ife amene amadziwitsa wosankha zochita ndikukonza ndondomeko yake. Awa ndi omwe angasinthe zinthu pochita chinachake anasintha. Palinso ine amene ndikufuna kutulutsa kusintha. Ndipo sizo zonse.

Mu "khamu" lathuli ndili ndi ambiri omwe adzatuluke pambuyo pake kusintha "Kupindula" m'njira yomwe ingachedwe ndi kusintha mofulumira.Wothamanga ikufuna "kupha" a osuta ndi okudya mwa ife pa mpikisano iyende bwino. Aluntha mwina ndalama ku fodya anagula bukhu kapena kukhala wodzilamulira chitukuko. Pa nthawi yomweyo ena Ine athu ngati hedonists kapena wranglers ali ndi nkhawa za tsogolo lawo. Chirichonse chimadalira pa chinthu chachikulu chimene ndikufuna kuchita kusintha.

Pali zilembo mwaife zomwe sizilimbamtima kwambiri kusintha N'zotheka, koma pali ena amene angachite zonsezi pakali pano ndi pomwepo. Kuti chirichonse chiri pafupi mochedwa monga dzulo kuti tizinena zaka zazing'ono. Akatswiri amatchula: ID, cholinga, superego, chikumbumtima, wakomoka, gulu chikomokere, chikumbumtima ... Kapena momwe ife imodzi kulibe wamkulu, kholo ndi mwana, ndi "zipolowe za mibadwo" Nthawi zambiri mbali ya maphunziro ndi kukulitsa. Ilo limalankhula za angelo oteteza, omwe amatanthawuza kukhalapo kwawo ...

Timayesetsa kupeza njira yothetsera vutoli malinga ndi kuyerekezera. Kuphweka zomwe ndiyenera kuchita ndi kuchita (kapena kuchita), kuti zomwe ndikufuna kuchita zichitike. Mwinamwake ndikufuna chinachake chisiye kuchitika kapena inde Ndimasintha chinachake chimene sichigwirizana nane pa chinachake.

Kodi (kuchita) ntchito ndi chifukwa chiyani

Tikhoza kuthetsa vutoli polimbikitsa, komabe tikhoza kusankha njira zothetsera vutoli mosagwiritsa ntchito nthawi yowonjezereka ngati nthawi yowonjezera yowonjezeredwa ku firiji, kapena kuchokera ku chilimwe kupita kumatayala a chisanu.

Titha kuthamanga ndi kuchotsa mafuta, koma osati pomwepo. Kubwereranso chifukwa chake tikhoza kuyesetsa kuthamanga ngati tikhoza kuthetsa izi mwa kusintha zakudya ndi zakudya. Mwina tingathe mofulumira kwambiri, pogwiritsa ntchito mchere wa mafuta kapena kuchepetsa mimba.

Kusuta kapena kumwa mowa kumathetsedwa ndi mapiritsi, patch, hypnosis, mauthenga achidziwitso, kusinkhasinkha, kupemphera, kupatula limodzi kapena gulu la mankhwala.

Kupambana koyamba

Kupambana koyamba kumakhala kozolowereka, koma posakhalitsa mphamvu zowonongeka zimapambana. Patapita kanthawi, m'malo mofooketsa momwe amachitira za chakudya chatsopano, tatha kuwonjezera "gram yina. Kapena takhala "tikulimbana" kwa mwezi wosasuta fodya, pambuyo pake "timapambana" kukhala kanthawi kochepa.

Zosangalatsa ndi zifukwa

chilengedwe amayamba kutithandiza, "Musati ungavomereze kusiya fodya", "Ngati inu mungakhoze kukhala muyenera kusiya", "Ayi zambiri mukuseka mtunduwo", "Zikomo Mulungu ndinu kusuta chifukwa munali zambiri mantha", "Kodi mumayang'ana pagalasi. "

Sintha

Pamene chilengedwe chimayambira, kudzithandizira kumayamba. Pambuyo povutika, nthawi zambiri zimatenga zaka kuti ayesenso ndi mankhwala ena. Kudzidalira kumaponyedwa kwa ife, pamene kulakwitsa ndi kukayikira mu luso lathu kumatenga mapiko.

"Sindidzakhalanso wopusa," "Madzi ndi mpweya zimagwera pa ine. Kotero siziri kwa ine ",

"Iwo omwe angakhoze kupambana mu chirichonse. Khalani pansi ndi cholinga, "" Amene adatha kudziwa chinachake ndikubisala ". Zonsezi, zinthu zikuwonjezereka ndi zomwe tikuyamba kukana mosadziŵa kusintha.

Kuwonjezera panyumba pomwe pali ambiri amene ali "wofunitsitsa" umene takupatsani chifukwa kukondwa, kuwonjezera wosakayika kulephera zawo zambiri osati "akatswiri" safuna kuchita chinachake kupereka. Pamene njirayi inagwira ntchito, iwo anasangalala kukutengerani inu monga chitsanzo. Tsopano, mlandu wa kulephera ndi wanu basi.

Mwadzidzidzi, alangizi otchuka zosiyanasiyana kukhala chitsanzo cha "mphamvu ya maganizo olakwika." "Inu munakhulupirira okwanira mu chimene iwe ukuchita", "Inu simuli yaitali chokwana m'maganizo bwino", "kubera mungasamale", "Tulukani zakuthupi," "kukwana kusokoneza chizolowezi chanu," "Sikuli mokwana ndi kuyensa. Zimatengera chipiriro, "" Chinthu chakuda kwambiri chili m'maŵa "...

Zotsatira za "kugwa"

Zowoneka zovuta zimapweteka. Timakhala ndi kuseka. Tinakhala kalekale osatetezeka chifukwa ife tawonetsa mfundo ofooka (omwe ndi khalidwe osati "anzeru"). Kusokonezeka maganizo komwe kumakhalapo kumapangitsa kudzidalira, kuganiza kwathu kumagwera. Pali ndemanga zosiyanasiyana, chisoni, kutsutsika, kusabala, kusakhutira ndi moyo ... Onse pa chiopsezo mwauzimu zoipa ndi mofulumira, amene akhoza kutaya ife kosamala pa yaitali.

Ena kulungamitsa mavuto "zazing'ono" sangapeze ( 'Ine kugula ndudu kwa ndalama zawo "," Ndimasangalala kusuta, "" ndudu ine bata, "" Ndili ndi kudya ndi kuvala zovala za ndalama zawo "," angati osangalala ndi wandiweyani pamene ndi "...).

Pamene pankhani zovuta kwambiri kuti kuphwanya ubale ndi anthu okondedwa, anzake pa ntchito (zomwe zochepa chikondi) kapena timakhala nawo ntchito, ndiye tili ndi vuto zambiri zazikulu ndi mavuto aakulu kwambiri.

Mu liwu limodzi, tinatha kupanga vuto limodzi. Ngati tinkasuta tisanayambe kuchipatala, tsopano timakhala tcheru, tizilombo toyambitsa matenda, osuta fodya. Ngati tinakhala ndi matendawa mwadzidzidzi musanamwalire, timakhala: opusa, psychopaths, mankhwala osokoneza bongo, odwala ali oopsa kwa chilengedwe, zosatheka.

Kutuluka kunja kwa malo otonthoza ndi mankhwala oopsya 

Ndikudziwa anthu omwe adasiya fodya atapita kwa dokotala. Zinali zokwanira kuwauza kuti adziwe ngati akusiyidwa kapena ngati asiya fodya. M'mayiko ena a chipani cha Socialist ambiri omwe amamwa mankhwala osokoneza bongo akhala akuchiritsidwa "pouma", ndiko kuti, aliyense amene apulumuka angachiritsidwe.

Ndizovuta kuti aliyense lero asankhe mankhwala opanikizika, omwe ndi achilendo ngati timavomereza kuti takhala masiku ambiri osasamala m'mimba mwa amayi athu. Komanso, palibe mankhwala opweteka omwe sagwira ntchito momwe tinakonzera. Kukhala m'mabvuto akadali vuto laling'ono kwambiri, koma kukhala ndi shuga kapena kupweteka kwamuyaya thanzi lanu sikutanthauza.

   Njira zothetsera mavuto

Wachibadwa wamalembedwa mochuluka. Pali zosankha zambiri zomwe tingasankhe. Mmodzi wa iwo ali kusintha maganizo athu okhudza kupambana ndi kulephera. Sizovuta. Ndikwanira kuona mwana akuphunzira kuyenda, kapena kukumbukira zoyambira zathu. Aloleni iwo amene atuluka mwa oyambirira abwere. Pamapeto pake, ena mwa othamanga apamwamba ayenera kubwera kumalo amenewa mwa kuwaphunzitsa mochepa kuposa ena. Nchifukwa chiyani mukuganiza kuti ndi zosiyana ndi inu?

Amene amatsatira gawo lolemba kapena kugwiritsira ntchito kulembera amadziwa kuti ayenera kumazoloŵera kukana. Olemba ambiri ambiri adzakhala (atakhala aakulu) okondwa kunena kuti pachiyambi komanso kwa makumi asanu ndi awiri anatumizira malemba awo kwa ofalitsa asanakhale ndi mwayi. Mabuku ogwira mtima nthawi zonse amatsindika zolephera zoyamba zomwe siziyenera kutiletsa koma zimatilimbikitsa ife. Kupambana kunali winawake yemwe adayesera kuyesa zambiri.

Palinso phindu lina. Ngati ubongo umaphunzira zinthu zatsopano zimakula pamene thupi limasunga (ngakhale kubwerera). Apo ayitimakhala aulesi, koma wodzaza ndi zifukwa pamene tikudzudzula ena chifukwa cha zomwe zikuchitika kwa ife. "Ena" sangathe kutulutsidwa, koma sayenera kuwonetsedwa.

Biheviorizam

Ngati tili ndi anasintha maganizo apeza mphamvu yogonjetsera kulephera ndi luso kuphunzira kudzera analimbana ndi bwino ndipo atalephera ife Ndatsegula tokha malo moyo mu mipata angathe zenizeni dziko ndi bwino kuposa mu zingalowe dziko kukhumbira mumangire ndi incoherent, anawoloka zongopeka ".

Izi zimangotanthauza kuti malingaliro onse ndi malingaliro angathe ndipo ayenera kukhala othandizana nawo. Zambiri ndi malangizo a mmene tingachitire kuti tikuphunzira malemba pa malo komanso m'mabuku kapena mafilimu, kudzera zokambiranazo kapena kugwira ntchito ndi dokotala wina.

Bihevioristi Zidzakhala bwino kufotokoza kuti taphunzira makhalidwe ambiri kudzera mukulimbikitsa. Ndikwanira kukumbukira zofufuza zomwe wasayansi wa ku Russian Pavlov anachita ndi agalu ndipo zonse zimakhala zomveka kwa ife.

Pomaliza ndikuti tingathe kusintha zambiri mwa ife mofanana. Njira imeneyi samostimulisanja. chifukwazomwe ife tiri mu mantha ozindikira pamwamba pa agalu akudziwa bwino zomwe mawu a kukondoletsa ndi kuteteza thupi kumatanthauza.

Mwina tingatsanzire ena mwa zitsanzo zathu komanso olemekezeka pamene tikukula ndi kupanga, mwinamwake iwo adagwirana ntchito ndi ife monga adaphunzitsira ndi kutiumba. Mwinamwake tinayamba ndi fodya, mowa, mankhwala osokoneza bongo kapena shit omwe amachititsa okonda masewera kuchokera pa TV kapena pamsewu. Tiyenera kukumbukira kuti sitinabadwe ndi ndudu kapena botolo. Sitinakhale ndi zifukwa zilizonse zoyipa, mwachitsanzo,

Onetsetsani kuti khalidwe lililonse lomwe simukukhutira nalo lingathe kusinthidwa ndikusinthidwa. Poyamba imapita pang'onopang'ono kuposa masitepe oyambirira. Pambuyo pake, kusintha kwa khalidwe kumawonjezereka. Timasangalala kukhala ambuye mmenemo.

Makhalidwe abwino pa cholinga

Kuti njira khalidwe kukwaniritsa cholinga m'pofunika bwino maganizo omwe mphamvu yogonjetsera kulephera ndi chiyembekezo ziriri, chenicheni ziyenera a zinthu, kuti muzilimbikira, akhale wokonzeka tipeze mwakhama.

Kuti zinthu zimuyendere bwino, sikokwanira kunena kuti: "Ndikufuna kuchoka ndudu," ngakhale ichi ndicho cholinga chathu chachikulu. Tifunika kulembera masiku angapo m'mbuyomu, ndipo pambuyo pokha tikugawana cholinga chachikuluchi mwazing'onozing'ono. Ndimakumbukira mnzanga wina amene anandiimbira fodya nditasiya fodya. "Ngati ndingatsike ndi gehena inayi tsiku ndi tsiku, Sindiwasiya."

Panthawi imeneyo, tifunika kusonkhanitsa "othandizira" akulu ndi ang'onoang'ono. Ndizosangalatsa kuti pang'onopang'ono mutenge chizolowezi choipa kapena khalidwe loipa. Chilichonse chiwerengedwera kuchokera ku kutafuna chingamu. Kupembedza kulikonse nokha. Pamapeto pake, ochita makhalidwe amatsindika kufunikira kophunzira momwe angathere mwamsanga.

Chilengedwe ndi kusintha

Chilengedwe sichiwoneka bwino nthawi zonse kuyesera kwathu. Tonsefe tikudziwa mawu oti dziko si malo abwino, koma tilibe. Pa kukwaniritsa dongosolo lanu, muyenera kupewa malo omwe angayankhe funso lathu. Sikoyenera kukhala pa cafesi yosuta fodya pofuna kusiya fodya pamene "ndi zofanana" ngati tikudziwa kuti ndi malo omwe timakonda kuwonjezera.

Tiyeneranso kudziwa kuti nthawi zina chilengedwe chimatigwiritsira ntchito mphamvu, chifukwa chake ambiri amachoka pambuyo pa maola angapo akutsutsa mosalekeza. Pamene sitingakhoze kuwerenga kapena kukumba tsiku lonse kotero sitingathe ngakhale kutsutsa ntchito iliyonse yomwe tikufuna kuti tipeze.Mu Shakespeare yomaliza: "Chilichonse chiri chokonzeka ngati mzimu wako uli wokonzeka". Zidzakhala kusintha kwenikweni. 

 

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